Stress is a Double Edged Sword

Date: January 7, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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One standard medical text estimates that 50 – 80% of all diseases have their origins in stress. Stress has both negative and positive effects on the body. It is positive when physical activity strengthens the heart and muscles. Exercise is a form of stress that produces positive physical and psychological results. The negative effects of stress are evident in diseases that originate from poor diets, lack of exercise, pollution and increased amounts of social stress. Emotional stress is more likely to cause disease than physical stress.

Disease is a long term effect of stress. Short term effects include elevated blood pressure, accelerated heart rate and loss of appetite. Stress can also alter a person’s brain wave activity, endocrine and immunological balances. Stress can cause sweaty palms (among other types of perspiration), dilated pupils, and difficulty in swallowing, which is often characterized as a ‘lump in the throat’. A person under stress may feel a tightness in the chest, and when the stress is relieved, the person says it is like ‘getting a load off the chest’. The stomach is also in danger from stress. Acid is pumped into the stomach during extreme stressful situations, creating an ideal environment for an ulcer to form. Many skin diseases result from emotional stress as well. The prolonged exposure to stress can also lower the body’s resistance to infection.

Stress has a tremendously negative effect on our ability to fight illness and disease because it suppresses our immune system’s capacity to produce and maintain lymphocytes and natural killer (NK) cells.

There are two factors responsible for illness or disease: an invading foreign substance and a lowered resistance. Stress can alter and may even shut down the immune response. This lowers our resistance and leaves us susceptible to attack from everything from the common cold virus to cancer cells. One cancer theory is that everyone at some point in his or her life develops a cancer. The difference between those who are afflicted and those who aren’t is their immune system response, which is controlled by stress. Cancer victims are the ones whose natural killer cells were weakened or made inactive by stress and therefore could not control the damaging cells.

The body responds to stress in three stages. Stage one is called the alarm stage. In this stage the body prepares to fight or flee when confronted by a stressor. Hormones are released from the endocrine glands and cause an increase in heartbeat and respiration, elevation in blood sugar level, increase in perspiration, dilated pupils and slowed digestion. At this point the body has a burst of energy that can be used to either fight or flee the stressor. It is during this stage that the resistance of the body is reduced.

Stage two is called the resistance stage and is used to repair any damage caused by the stress. Resistance can occur only if the stressor is not too powerful. Body adaptation develops to fight back the stress or possibly avoid it.

If the stressor remains consistent, the body is thrown into stage three, the exhaustion stage. Stage one symptoms reappear at this point. This is the most dangerous stage because disease can develop if the stress persists. If the stressor does not let up, the person may experience migraine headaches, heart irregularities or even mental illness. The body can even run out of energy and may even shut down its basic functions.

This three stage process is called the General Adaptation Syndrome. The resistance stage is dangerous in that we adapt to the stressor. In other words, we become adjusted to a higher level of stress without noticing it. We feel good, unaware that our body is still in a state of stress resistance.

Our body works overtime during this stage to keep us healthy, but at the same time it loses its ability to keep up with the demand the stress puts upon it. The General Adaptation Syndrome is thought to be the reason stress is becoming such an abundant source of health problems. Today’s society is becoming more complex, offering increased demands and new challenges we must constantly face at a faster and more intense pace. By changing the way our body normally functions, these stress challenges disrupt the natural balance crucial for well-being. Stress can virtually eliminate our chances for extending and improving life. It does so by breaking down resistance and increasing the odds that all our bodily functions will eventually give out and fail us.

To understand what physiological processors take place during stress, we must look at the brain. When stress occurs, the nerve impulses reach the brain and stimulate the hypothalamus. The hypothalamus does two things. First, it sends nerve impulses to the adrenal glands located on top of our kidneys, and second, it sends a chemical message to the pituitary gland located at the base of the brain.

Stimulation of these glands is what prepares the body for the fight or flight response mentioned earlier. This process causes three more reactions: a surge of adrenaline, a discharge of cortisol and a release of endorphin. Adrenaline causes the heart rate to quicken, which increases blood pressure and blood flow. This brings extra oxygen – nature’s purest fuel – to every cell in the body. Adrenaline also increases glucose or blood sugar necessary for extra energy needed during stressful encounters.

Cortisol causes an increase in blood amino acids as well as an increase in blood sugar. Protein is made up of amino acids, and because stress leads to tissue damage, proper recovery depends on cortisol being released by the adrenal gland.

Endorphin is released by the brain in any stress situation. It is several hundred times more potent than morphine and works as a natural tranquilizer. Exercise causes endorphins to be released, and therefore a regular exercise program will heighten one’s ability to combat normal daily stressors. People who do not exercise are more susceptible to the negative effects of stress reactions.

Good versus Bad Stress: The Difference can Help or Hurt You

Although the stress response is basically the same in all of us, the degree to which it affects us depends on how we handle stress as individuals. Stress can be either good or bad depending on how we perceive it. We can become more stress tolerant by changing our attitudes and conditioning ourselves to look at it in a new way. We need to change our response to stress from negative and harmful to positive and beneficial – to view it as something constructive rather than destructive.

To achieve this shift in attitude we must be highly internally motivated. The internally motivated person feels that he or she is in control of events that occur – that they are masters of their own fate. We commonly refer to these people as self made individuals, who, in spite of the odds against them, pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps.

On the other end of the spectrum is the external person, who feels that ‘no matter how hard I try, the deck is stacked against me’. In general, good stress results from situations we can control and bad stress results from situations we have no control over. This internal/external view of life determines whether an individual feels control over stressors. External people are stress prone because they feel powerless to control or influence the events around them.

Stress Prone Personalities

A more common identification of internal/external personalities is Type A and Type B people. A type A personality is someone who is hard driving, excitable, volatile, and success and career oriented. These people rush from appointment to appointment. They’re continually bombarded with short term stress and create dangerous health situations because they allow no time for relaxation. They are the prime candidates for a heart attack.

Type B personalities are just the opposite. They’re relaxed and unhurried, patient, non competitive, non aggressive, and are not under severe time constraints. But being at this end of the spectrum is not necessary healthy either. Selye theorized that some people suffer from too little stress – something he called hypostress. These people actually need more external stimuli and more activity into their lives. They become addicted to drugs or alcohol due to a lack of motivation and the stabilizing effect of constructive goals. This does not mean that all type B personalities are unmotivated or spend all of their time meditating. It’s just a factor that must be considered when weighing the pros and cons in each type of personality.

It’s possible for type A people to modify their behavior by changing their outlook on stress and breaking some of the long term stress habits they’ve acquired over the years. Certain exercises, called Type B Behavior Exercises, can help a type A person achieve a new approach to stress. These exercises include: putting down your knife and fork between bites at meal time, forcing yourself to do more recreational activities, spending the entire day without your watch, and turning your frowns into smiles even when it hurts. The idea is that once people recognize themselves as type A, they can then modify their behavior.

Utilize, Eliminate & Transform Your Stress

Date: January 7, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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In these days, up to 40% young people to 80% workers report stress. Where does the stress come from? One time, a friend of mine complained of feeling stressed. Then he pointed out how loud his girls were speaking. To me, that was perfectly normal. Stress can come from external world as well as our own beliefs, standards, perceptions and health.
Stress can also be a good motivator, and let us fly to the moon. This mechanism helps some people recover from severe injuries since stress can increase blood flow to 300% to 400% in the brain, lungs and muscles. It takes skills to keep a good balance, not to get over strained, nor age fast.
Stress costs U.S. corporations $300 billion annually in medical costs, turnover and absenteeism (American Institute of Stress 2006), and makes 52% companies struggle to retain their top employees (Watson Wyatt 2007). In addition, stress can disable our clear thinking, the key to solutions and productivity.
Stress relievers at work, such as plan for the unexpected and yoga in the conference room, and stress-relieving workouts, like biking and brisk walking, are important. It would be better if we can increase personal control, and look into the underlying problems while having a personal relaxation hierarchy to relax efficiently from airline delay to Second War World II.
There was an article about stress management for a disabled lady who lived on second floor and had a hard time to get out. While she could benefit from many relaxation exercises, her deep problem remains — isolation, physical and psychological, which made her more vulnerable to stress. Stress is the most severe when an individual has high demand and little control, proven by research. What she needs most is an easy access for her wheel chair, so she would have more control and enjoy more outdoor activities. Volunteering for charity can help her further.
Having a good insights of self and others can not only eliminate the stress created by our own, but also save a lot of future stress. A high school principal in New York disciplined one student who was then sent to prison. After he got out of jail, the student went back to school to revenge the principal. The principal answered the student’s hot button push, unfortunately, lost his control and put his career in jeopardy.
Sometimes, an “unconventional” solution just works better. A huge family “mess” stressed out an attorney. One big issue was that his sister sued them. His parents favored him over his sister, and gave him nearly 90% of the inheritance. The sister filed one lawsuit after another to fight for her share. No family fund had been set up, which could spare usually 20-45% of parents’ assets when they died. If they could give her part of the estate tax, the sister would be happy to drop all the lawsuits. The legal solution is the simplest way here to alleviate their stress, and make it easier to look into the underlying problem. The attorney was speechless.
An extra piece of knowledge can be the most powerful stress switcher. A poor man ran into an abusive officer who loved to gain her pleasure “legally” out of his misery because his social class and gifts were “superior to hers.” He had tried several ways and failed. At the end, he lost his sleep and appetite once he knew her coming. The poor man was pleased with his finding after I raised the question of “territory” and quickly moved out of her “jurisdiction.”
To eliminate stress may be hard but possible. One physician suffered a sever head injury that every expert predicted 100% and permanent disability. Cognitive ability to an MD is like running ability to a Marathon athlete — life or death. None of the stress relievers, from deep breathing, to painting, to horseback riding, to massage … could spare the pain or stress permanently, but bought her the time and mind to try everything that we could possibly find. At the end, the doctor fully recovered, and did excellent in her practice. For someone who would rather die than be disabled,to recover fully is the only solution. Her will and personal relaxation hierarchy helped to find her the tools to eliminate her deep stress.
We can also “artificially” eliminate the stress. A CEO suffered newly onset insomnia due to her business. Neither her personal relaxation methods nor sleeping pills could work — it was the feeling of insecure stressed her most. Sleep is very important to productivity, wellness and beauty. However, she would not have the “real” sense of security until her business thrived. She chose self-hypnosis over several ways and placed her faith as “the sense of security” directly into her unconscious. From the day of the installation, she could sleep like a log at night. Her business has grown bigger and bigger.
Stress can also be transformed. Here is my favorite case. A physician could not overcome severe depression two years after he lost his wife. Dr. Viktor E. Frankl, the author of Man’s Search for Meaning, asked the doctor what would have happened if he had died first, and his wife had had to survive him. The doctor said that would be terrible to her to suffer. After Dr. Frankl told the patient that it was his suffering that had spared his wife’s, the patient said nothing but shook Dr. Frankl’s hand and left calmly. Nobody could revive the patient’s wife, but the meaning that Dr. Frankl had found transformed the stress into something worth bearing. Bad things can happen to good people. The stress can be a door opener if we can find its good meaning.
The above are sample cases used at The Prince Synergy. You can tell that stress can come from external worlds as well as our own mind, health and our relations with external and internal world. We can utilize stress, prevent stress, relax well from stress, and ultimately handle stress efficiently at different stages. We don’t have to let stress govern our life. Furthermore, we can reduce medical costs, turnover and absenteeism, yet enjoy better work/life balance, look and feel young.

Ebenezer Scrooge Had a Life Coach?

Date: January 6, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Uncategorized
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When Charles Dickens provided Ebenezer Scrooge with the ghost of Christmas future, he created what may have been the first literary description of a life coaching experience. When Ebenezer’s poltergeist showed the old fellow a view of the future, he was employing a powerful tool used by professional life coaches to help their clients live a happier and more fulfilled life.

The biggest difference between Scrooge’s ghost and today’s life coach is we make the process painless. We help our clients to create the future they want. We guide clients in developing a crystal clear vision of exactly what their future will look, feel and be like when they have achieved their goals. We help them to create plans, prioritize and take actions, and remain accountable to achieving results. We also help them to identify and overcome any potential obstacles or roadblocks that may stand in their way of achieving success and living their dreams.

If Scrooge’s apparition would have taken a modern day Life Coach Training Course, he would have served his client much better.. As it was they just scared the hell out of poor old Ebenezer and left him on his own to figure things out. It worked well in the story, but it doesn’t always work that way in real life.

Life coaching can make a huge difference in a client’s life especially when times are tough like those in Scrooge’s day, and like the times we find ourselves in today. Having a trained life coach in one’s corner can be the difference between living a life filled with happiness and participation or moving through life wishing and hoping it could be better.

In the month of November of 2008, Google reports over 135,000 searches for the term “Life Coach”. This is one of the reasons we see more and more talented people interested in attending Coaches Institute International’s Certified Life Coach Training Course. These folks want to help. They feel a genuine calling to leave this world a better place than it was when they first arrived. And, based on recent statistics they have a lot of people to help.

Back in 1843, Ebenezer Scrooge may not have had the benefit of a professionally trained life coach, never the less his experience was life changing. Unfortunately, many of us won’t have the benefit of Scrooge’s midnight visitor. And, who really wants to be awakened in the middle of the night for a life coaching session anyway?

Symptoms of Stress – Warning Signs of Stress

Date: January 6, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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Stress Introduction

Stress is something that has become synonymous with our everyday life. Though everybody has problems, tragedies, challenges, and frustrations, being stressed for long time, and habitually can drain you out physically, as well as mentally. A stressed mind requires you to make certain adjustments in your attitude, your priorities, your life style, your habits and the way you respond to certain situations. However, when you fail to do so, for one or more occasion, you are stressed. Gradually, it becomes a part of your life and as medical practitioners say, stress is a disease that becomes chronic over a period of time.

Stress adds misery to your life, making you pessimist and negative in perception, and reacting negatively to different situations. The specific signs and symptoms of stress may vary from person to person; however, all symptoms are harmful for your health. It also affects your emotional well-being, and your relationships with others. Generally you can see and tell whether a person had been leading a happy and healthy life style or has been leading a stressful life. There are some common symptoms that are seen in most of the people who are under stress. Symptoms of Stress

The symptoms of stress are seen in one’s body language, physical health, behavior and habits, and one’s mindset as to how one responds in certain situations. One category of symptoms is related to one’s intellectual self. The patient may experience memory loss, inability to make decisions, not able to concentrate, and the person is always in confused state of mind. You lose your power of judgment and are not objective in your approach to life.

Stress can lead to emotional drain of a person. Since you might have lost your judgment and ability of objective analysis of situations, you tend to be emotional. An emotionally stressed person becomes moody and hypersensitive to situations. Depression overpowers you and you are often angry. You lack confidence and are always looking for sympathy from near and dear ones. Since people with high level of emotional stress are moody, you may tend to laugh or cry in such situations where it is not required at all.

Apart from the mental effects, stress also weakens you physically. A person who is stressed and remains tense is not physically healthy. One of the most common symptoms of stress is frequent headache. You may have improper digestive system and a weak immunity. Your body loses strength to fight diseases and you can not sleep properly. Over a period of time, your body loses energy and you are easily fatigued. You may lose weight, or you gain weight astonishingly quickly, even without any change in your diet. Many a times, it develops into some serious disease such as chest pain, breathlessness and irregular heartbeat as well. You blood pressure will rise to above normal will stagnate there, almost permanently. This may lead to life threatening situations.

Stress leads to anxiety disorders and behavioral problems. You may suddenly notice yourself eating too less or eating too much. Same with you sleeping disorder; either sleeping too much, or not sleeping at all. Such patients like to remain isolated, and they overreact to emotional and confrontational situations. You may get used to alcohol or using drugs, thus further affecting your health. You get short-tempered. The situation where you are not comfortable or when you are nervous, nail biting and jaw grinding becomes a habit.

There can be some external factors that contribute to stress. If you notice a few of these symptoms of stress, consult a good doctor and communicate your behavioral changes. It is the job of your physician to identify the core reason of your stress and to guide you out of the situation. Why Symptoms of Stress Vary

Different people respond to same situations in different ways. Even if many people feel stressed because of same situation, the effects on them may vary – physically, mentally, and psychologically. For example, one can feel frustrated because one is not able to convince the colleague or spouse, and is stressed. The other may avoid conflict and still can be stressed. You can be stressed because of your relationships, some issue at your workplace, your neighbor, some social issues that you can not avoid, financial problem, handicap or a prolonged ailment. Stress symptoms vary because of one’s education, upbringing, and the kind of social support system that one gets.

When you tend to avoid conflict because of stress, you develop withdrawal symptoms. You dislike social gatherings, parties, functions and meetings for the fear of conflict. However avoiding the situation further aggravates the problem. People around you should make an effort and support you to come out of this shell. First of all, it is important to understand that this is a medical problem. Next, one should try to understand the reasons that cause stress and then figure out options to overcome that.

What’s the Difference Between Life Coaching and Psychotherapy?

Date: January 6, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Uncategorized
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What’s the difference between Life Coaching and Psychotherapy?

by: Johnny Blogger consultant with www.mychicagotherapist.com

The primary difference between a life coach and a psychotherapist or mental health counselor is that psychotherapists and counselors commonly “treat” clinical issues, such as an existing mental health problem like depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, etc. A life coach however does not treat anything. Therefore, life coach services are not covered by insurance programs.

 

Another difference between traditional psychotherapy and Life coaching is that in psychotherapy, the client is generally going through severe pain and suffering. They are seeking relief and looking to the therapist to “fix” them or help them eliminate their problem. The client will seek therapy to deal with their acute distress so they can then leave, terminate the relationship, and resume their previous life. In short, they are being treated for something.

 

More about the differences between Life Coaching and Psychotherapy

 

In Life Coaching, the relationship may typically be short term or it could last months and years. Sometimes there are situations where a client wishes time-limited life coaching , such as being coached through a special project or personal transition. An example might be learning how to better communicate in preparation for a job interview or promotion.  This is different from psychotherapy where there could be a brief encounter with a therapist for a specific issue or concern, such as overwhelming grief over the loss of a loved one. Sometimes the client may be severely emotionally damaged and need to stay in psychotherapy for many years simply to maintain an emotional holding pattern. Again, the primary difference is that Life Coaching is not focused on treating a problem – where psychotherapy is.

 

Differences in boundaries between Life Coaching and traditional Psychotherapy/Counseling

 

The boundaries that exist in the psychotherapy relationship are quite rigid. This is mostly because the patient/client is usually suffering a clinically diagnosable condition, and sometimes they can be very fragile emotionally. Breeching these boundaries can often be devastating for the patient/client. Some boundaries can include no contact outside of the therapeutic setting, e.g., office, clinic, hospital, etc. except in very rare and extenuating circumstances. Self-disclosure on the part of the psychotherapist is generally minimal. Also, allowing a genuine two-way dialogue to evolve is not supported. Life Coaching has a much more flexible set of boundaries. The assumption is that the life coach is dealing with an emotionally healthy, relatively well-adjusted and effectively functioning individual. Therefore, appropriate self-disclosure by the coach, more authenticity, lightness, fun and friendliness in the relationship is often the rule.

 

About the author:

 

Johnny Blogger is a consultant in the mental health field and contributes his marketing services to organizations such as 2nd Story Consultants in Chicago at http://www.mychicagotherpist.com

The Benefits of Having a Life Coach

Date: January 5, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Uncategorized
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Life coaching is a relatively new title to an old trade and many people do not know what a life coach can do for them, so I am going to list the benefits of having a life coach in this article. Let me start this off by saying that one of the secrets of highly successful people is that most of them use, in some form or another, a coach to help them get to where they want to be in life or in business or both. A coach, mentor, advisor or whatever title you want to call them, can help you identify goals and can motivate you to make those goals a reality for your future. Here are the benefits of having a life coach:

Setting Goals. One of the primary focuses of a life coach is that of setting and reaching goals. One of the main reasons people have difficulty manifesting success in their life is simply because they have no idea what their own idea of personal success really is. It’s like a businessman with no business. Without any source of direction, how can a person expect any quantifiable results? A life coach can use questioning to isolate what is most important to their client and once that goal or goals are isolated, then the life coach can help “reverse engineer” that goal to come up with a workable plan that can be put into action.

Clarity. A life coach can help you clarify your present condition and your future directions.

Action. Success rarely manifests itself. Knowledge and ideas are great to have, but they also do not manifest success in and of themselves. Action is what creates success in life. The reason why many intelligent and knowledgeable people do not experience the level of success that they desire is because they are slow to act on or apply the knowledge that they have. A life coach can help their client make decisions much more quickly and reduce costly delays and provide better quality action with less risk.

Motivation. Even the best experts in the world utilize coaches, consultants, and personal advisors because there is a strong psychological factor of accountability when another person has oversight on your progress. Actors, models, even bodybuilders have personal trainers who make sure they are keeping up on their program to reach their intended goals and this acts as a powerful motivating force for them. Such is the same with life coaches. They motivate their clients towards their goals and they make them accountable for maintaining their program and sticking to it.

Support. A life coach will listen to your story without evaluating, criticizing, judging, or offering solutions. They will lend their support for you through the toughest of times as well as the best of times.

Overcoming Challenges. We all face certain roadblocks in our lives that need to be overcome for us to achieve measurable success. A life coach can help their client brainstorm for possible solutions to complex challenges that need to be deal with.

Life Balance. A life coach can improve the ratio of work versus play in your life to achieve an optimal balanced ratio of both which will lead to reduced stress levels and a better quality of life.

Consulting. Most life coaches specialize in some aspect of expertise such as entrepreneurship, health and fitness, or stress management. The knowledge that they possess as a consultant can be invaluable to their client if they require the use of such skills.

Confidentiality. Although life coaching is not therapy or counseling, ethics dictate that the same rules of client confidentiality apply to coaching sessions. Therefore, what is discussed between a client and a life coach is strictly confidential.

Detecting Stress

Date: January 5, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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Are you suffering from stress? Have you been lately feeling low about anything that’s happening in your life? Is stress the main reason behind all the negativity you suffer from?

A lot of people suffer from stress these days. However, only few of these people actually come to know that they are stressed out.

There are a lot of things you can do to remove stress in your life. However, to make certain efforts and getting relief from the stress you are suffering from, you need to know that you have been attacked by stress.

Here are some symptoms that would indicate that you are stressed out.

a) Memory problems

This is one of the major problems suffered by people who are stressed out.

b) Indecisiveness

Most of us are indecisive at one point in our lives. However, if this becomes a regular affair then take it seriously. There is something wrong. This is one of a strong indication that you are undergoing a lot of stress.

c) Inability to concentrate

When suffering from stress, you are generally not able to focus. It becomes almost impossible to concentrate on one thing.

d) Trouble thinking

One is unable to think clearly when stressed out.

e) Poor judgment

Most often, we are not able to judge properly. Most of our judgment goes wrong. This is due to the stress we face in our life.

f) Negative approach

Experiencing a lot of stress can put negative impact in our lives. You tend to take every single thing in a negative manner.

g) Anxiety

When under stress, you tend to show a lot of anxiety. You may also suffer from racing thoughts of either past or what’s going to happen in future.

h) Constant worry

Stress makes an individual worry constantly about different things in life.

i) Loss of objectivity

This is another strong sign of stress. One tends to feel that he or she does not have any object in life.

j) Fearful anticipation

Nothing seems to go right when one under goes stress. Stress makes one feel that something wrong has happened or something wrong is going to happen. Thereafter one tends to think about the bad consequences.

k) Short temper

Stress can affect one’s temperament. One tends to get very short tempered. So, if you feel that you have become unusually short tempered or tend to lose temper easily, you need to do something about it. You are suffering from a lot of stress.

l) Depression or general unhappiness

When under stress, one tends to feel depressed or get unhappy without any reason.

m) A sense of loneliness

One may feel lonely, is unable to retain a relationship or make friends. This is due to the stress one is facing.

n) Unable to sleep

A lot of stress makes it difficult for an individual to enjoy sound sleep.

Other major symptoms of stress include the following:

• Feeling overwhelmed

• Chest pain; Rapid heart beat

• Skin breakouts

• Loss of sex drive

• Frequent cold

• Nervous habits; Overreacting to unexpected trouble

• Picking fights with others without a good reason.

• Teeth grinding

Remember that in order to remove stress from your life, you need to recognize stress.

How Hypnotherapy Birthing Techniques Began

Date: January 4, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Uncategorized
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The fame of birthing hypnotherapy, the Mongan method, is spreading fast by word of mouth, simply because it works so well, and that’s how it has always spread. When Marie Mongan had her first baby, she had read the book ‘Childbirth Without Fear’ by Grantly Dick-Reed and practiced the techniques it taught. She had her first baby in hospital as was the generally accepted practice in America, then as now, and when she arrived she announced to the nurse that she was planning to have a natural birth. With a superior smirk the nurse maintained that she would ‘soon be screaming like the rest of them’ and left her alone in a room with a clock so that she could ‘time her pains’. Husbands certainly were not allowed. Marie used the techniques she had practiced and eventually felt the need to push, so she rang the bell for the nurse who came and announced that she couldn’t possibly want to push yet. Grudgingly she examined her, and saw the baby’s head beginning to emerge. At this point it was the nurse who panicked, told Marie to cross her legs and pant, bundled her onto a trolley, and rushed her down the corridor to the delivery room where she was transferred to a hard surgical couch, legs put in stirrups, and wrists strapped to the couch. A chloroform mask was placed on her face, and the next thing she knew was that she came round and there was a baby lying in a cradle beside her with forceps marks on his head. She had simply been caught up in the hospital protocols of the day. She was a mixture of furious, disappointed and upset, and then exactly the same thing happened when her second baby arrived. By the time she was pregnant for the third time she was wise to the ways of current obstetrical practice and insisted that her obstetrician give orders that she be allowed to birth in the natural way that she had planned. With the knowledge that she has gained since she would probably have opted for a home birth. The obstetrician agreed, and then she dropped the bombshell that she wanted to have her husband there too. In those days this was completely unknown, but she stuck to her guns and eventually obtained permission. When she went into labour, she found people coming and looking round the door of her room to see this strange phenomenon of a woman who planned to give birth naturally, and that was exactly what she did. Her daughter was born in a calm and natural delivery with no drugs and no pain. When that daughter grew up and became pregnant, Marie taught her what she had done for her own birth and, in addition, the hypnotherapy birth techniques that she had subsequently learned, and it worked again. Her daughter gave birth calmly and naturally with no drugs and no pain. Of course all her friends were of an age to be having babies, and they wanted to know about these wonderful and effective techniques too, so Marie taught them. And so it spread, and spread, and spread by word of mouth, simply because women wanted it because it worked. That was sixteen years ago in America, and it spread throughout America and Canada, and then, about six years ago Marie came to England and taught, and the effect was exactly the same. It spread by word of mouth because it works and women want it. And that’s how it still spreads, which is the best way of all, and the hypnosis for birth is causing a positive revolution in the practice of childbirth in this country, and in the expectations and experience of pregnant women.

The fame of birthing hypnotherapy, the Mongan method, is spreading fast by word of mouth, simply because it works so well, and that’s how it has always spread.

When Marie Mongan had her first baby, she had read the book ‘Childbirth Without Fear’ by Grantly Dick-Reed and practiced the techniques it taught. She had her first baby in hospital as was the generally accepted practice in America, then as now, and when she arrived she announced to the nurse that she was planning to have a natural birth. With a superior smirk the nurse maintained that she would ‘soon be screaming like the rest of them’ and left her alone in a room with a clock so that she could ‘time her pains’. Husbands certainly were not allowed.

Marie used the techniques she had practiced and eventually felt the need to push, so she rang the bell for the nurse who came and announced that she couldn’t possibly want to push yet. Grudgingly she examined her, and saw the baby’s head beginning to emerge. At this point it was the nurse who panicked, told Marie to cross her legs and pant, bundled her onto a trolley, and rushed her down the corridor to the delivery room where she was transferred to a hard surgical couch, legs put in stirrups, and wrists strapped to the couch. A chloroform mask was placed on her face, and the next thing she knew was that she came round and there was a baby lying in a cradle beside her with forceps marks on his head. She had simply been caught up in the hospital protocols of the day.

She was a mixture of furious, disappointed and upset, and then exactly the same thing happened when her second baby arrived.

By the time she was pregnant for the third time she was wise to the ways of current obstetrical practice and insisted that her obstetrician give orders that she be allowed to birth in the natural way that she had planned. With the knowledge that she has gained since she would probably have opted for a home birth. The obstetrician agreed, and then she dropped the bombshell that she wanted to have her husband there too. In those days this was completely unknown, but she stuck to her guns and eventually obtained permission.

When she went into labour, she found people coming and looking round the door of her room to see this strange phenomenon of a woman who planned to give birth naturally, and that was exactly what she did. Her daughter was born in a calm and natural delivery with no drugs and no pain.

When that daughter grew up and became pregnant, Marie taught her what she had done for her own birth and, in addition, the hypnotherapy birth techniques that she had subsequently learned, and it worked again. Her daughter gave birth calmly and naturally with no drugs and no pain. Of course all her friends were of an age to be having babies, and they wanted to know about these wonderful and effective techniques too, so Marie taught them. And so it spread, and spread, and spread by word of mouth, simply because women wanted it because it worked.

That was sixteen years ago in America, and it spread throughout America and Canada, and then, about six years ago Marie came to England and taught, and the effect was exactly the same. It spread by word of mouth because it works and women want it. And that’s how it still spreads, which is the best way of all, and the hypnosis for birth is causing a positive revolution in the practice of childbirth in this country, and in the expectations and experience of pregnant women.

What Is Life Coaching?

Date: January 4, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Uncategorized
Comments: Leave a reply

Are you wondering what is life coaching? It is becoming increasingly popular and something that you may want to consider for yourself.
First, it is important to differentiate this from things like therapy and counseling.
Focus of therapy is primarily in healing by addressing emotions, behavior and disruptive situations by looking into the past to find out how a client behaves in a certain way. According to Wikipedia, therapy is the attempted remediation of a health problem, usually following a diagnosis. Counseling is more treatment of everyday problems.
Life coaching is about looking into building a future. It is about achieving goals that you set for yourself. If could be in different areas like making more money, seeking happiness in life, excellence in sports, professional excellence and many more.
Problem is that although people want to achieve great things in life, sometimes they find it difficult to self assess, develop a plan and take action for themselves. Uncertainty creeps in and confusion seems to reign. This is where life coaching helps.
The life coach works with you to work on your goals and develop the plan required to achieve it. The coach encourages and if required gets a little tough on you to ensure your progress. The coach becomes a sounding board. You will be amazed at how much you already know but just could not organize and look at it in a way that it can deliver good value for you.
If you decide to get life coaching, then you need to evaluate carefully to ensure that you get a life coach that is not only qualified but also best suited for the life coaching area that you are interested in and you can relate to.
Shortlist first by identifying those who work on your specific area of interest. You may want to call those who have attended their life coaching programs for feedback. Find out where the coaching sessions will be held. Distance of the location may be a deciding factor if the sessions are face-to-face. Fees, of course, is the other factor.
Even if a life coach can fit all your other requirements, the chemistry between the two of you is important. Most coaches also provide a free introductory session. Make use of this session to see if there is good fit between the two of you. Is this a person that you feel knows the stuff and someone that you will listen to? As your sessions will be one-to-one, if you cannot seeing yourself working together with this person, it is better not to select this life coach.
Life coach aside, once you decide on life coaching, it is important that you become committed to its success. You need to be open and dig deep into issues. It may get uncomfortable but it is difficult to achieve great things without getting out of your comfort zone. You need to follow through on the actions. Whether the life coaching will succeed or fail will ultimately depend on you.
Now that you know what is life coaching, decide if this can help you. If it can help you but the cost of having a one-to-one life coach is high, then look into alternatives of how you can still get life coaching.

Stress Management: is Necessity the Mother of Good Inventions, Bad Inventions, or Whatever Getsyou Through the Night

Date: January 3, 2010
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
Comments: Leave a reply

Stress Management: Is Necessity The Mother of Good Inventions, Bad Inventions Or Whatever Gets You Through The Night 

 

 “Stress” and “stress management” are terms that roll off our tongues as if understanding them is second nature to us all.  To make sure we are all on the same page let’s start with a working definition of stress courtesy of Dictionary.com.

 

1)An applied force or system of forces that tend to strain or deform the body, 2) The resisting force set up in a body as a result of an extremely applied force and 3) A physical or psychological stimulus that can produce mental tension or physiological reactions that may lead to illness. 

 

If  you can’t relate to the language used in these definitions just pay attention to the fact that all three definitions speak define stress in negative terms.   This is as far from the truth as me telling you that coins have one side to them.  Stress exists along a continuum.   There is for each individual and each activity an optimum level of stress that enhances performance and stimulates growth producing adaptations.  One person pushed to perform in school may respond with excellent test scores.  Another may either become anxious and have difficulties concentrating,  go blank or even worse get so anxious as to not to show up for the test.   Due to the interplay of genetics, learning, and accidents of fate different people may respond very differently to levels of stress applied in different situations. 

 

For instance, Tiger Woods is more likely than most professional golfers to perform at his best when internal and expectations rise during the major golf championships.  He is now playing for his ranking in golf’s pantheon of immortals.  Many of his peers will be his equal for 1, 2, or maybe 3 rounds only to lose their cool on Sundays during the final rounds of major tournaments with victory on the line.  If they are playing in The Hartford Open instead of The Masters many will manage the stress of the moment very differently.  Others depending on their longevity on The PGA Tour might have identical degrees of difficulty no matter what the prestige level of the tournament.  How Tiger Woods was trained by his father to compete under pressure has been widely publicized.  Was he blessed with extraordinary athletic gifts?  This is probably a safe bet.  Clearly, his competitive fires burn at just the right temperature.  If  Tiger and his peers get themselves worked up into a frenzy like football players getting ready to wage their proverbial Sunday wars, their fine motor skills that translate muscle memory to well executed shots might very well abandon them.  They would not have the violent outlets to modulate and control their states of heightened readiness.  Football players and golfers have different levels of optimum stress to ready themselves to perform at their bests.      

 

 

Optimum levels of stress promote optimum performance.  To illustrate this accepted notion let’s take for example, aerobic exercise. This stressor to our systems is known to be a mood elevator, and an anxiety reducing activity.  Whether your activity of choice is swimming, cycling running, dance or time on the step master in the gym, there are countless health benefits of a sensible exercise regimen.  Your heart and lungs, bones and muscles will grow stronger if the stress to your body is such that during intervals of rest and repair, the organ systems responsible for physical performance grow stronger.  This will translate to being able to perform more work at lower levels of exertion.   Other benefits include being more resistant to muscular skeletal injuries.  Studies have indicated that people who exercise regularly have healthier immune systems that are more resistant to illness, and a healthier cholesterol profile that points to a lesser likelihood of a premature build up of plaque in their arteries.  Exercisers tend to lose excess weight as exercise burns calories during exercise and at a higher than normal rate for hours after the exercise has stopped.  The rise in the blood sugar is also an appetite depressant.  I’m not just air brushing the warts on this profile of stress, I am emphasizing that optimum levels of stress are catalysts for growth and development.  The complete absence of stress would severely curtail our abilities to succeed.  We would not evolve and actualize our potential as people as quickly as we do if we would do so at all.  Necessity is the mother of invention. 

 

Too little stress on our bodies during exercise will not stimulate growth in our capacities to perform work.  To much stress may produce a host of negative consequences to our health and well being that are every bit as worrisome as the aforementioned benefits were wondrously encouraging. Too much exercise combined with and/or too little rest may strain our bodies and or minds setting off a cascading deterioration of mind/body level of functioning.  I have been around enough runners in my time to have learned first hand that this activity not unlike a pack of cigarettes should come with the warning: “Running may be hazardous to your health.”  If we are tired or sick and have become too dependent on the release of endorphins from the pleasure center of your brains to feel good,  you may continue this activity long beyond the point of diminishing returns and become deaf to your bodies screaming to you that you need to rest. 

 

Over use syndromes can lead to a host of muscular skeletal injuries, and fatigue syndromes that leave people feeling like they have the flu.  A immune system compromised by physical exhaustion may lead to symptoms of depression which may in turn further compromise the immune system and leave the door open to a host of physical maladies.  To feel compelled to exercise to discharge stress from our bodies and experience “the runners high” may leave runners anxious and over time depressed.  When we feel out of control of ourselves the potential to lose our cool and engage in mindless and impulsive actions is a strong human tendency.   Furthermore, in addition to the potentially shame producing, self esteem eroding reactions to losing control of ourselves, we may begin over time to feel hopeless and helpless to steer ourselves as we see fit unless, we can consciously connect with and exercise authority over these impulses, feelings and beliefs.  Teaching people how to regain control of themselves is what psychotherapists like myself do.  

 

Negative stress is compounded by an over reliance or unhealthy dependence on unhealthy stress management strategies; activities that may cause us to ignore our needs to address stressful problems in our lives.  We call such unhealthy dependencies addictive relationships.   If a loved one is pressuring us with expectations that feel overwhelming or are simply expectations we do not wish to meet we may choose to address the matter directly or we may seek to escape our dilemma and go for a long run or bike ride hoping to feel significantly different about the problem.  We may “feel better” temporarily discharging tension in our bodies however, we will not have moved any closer toward the resolution of our problem.  In fact, the more we run away from any problems the bigger the albatrosses they become around our necks.   Look what happens to those of us who do everything they can to rationalize staying away from the dentist’s office.  That intermittent tooth pain we wish to minimize may actually disappear for awhile and at some point resurface only to express itself one morning as a raging infection that blows one side of our face up to the size of a grapefruit.  The more we minimize and deny the existence of the necessity to cope with rather than to pursue temporary band aids on problems, the less capable we feel to cope with the problem and the more stressful the problem becomes.  This is both due to allowing a small problem to become a larger problem due to neglect, and also because like muscles that go unused and are permitted to atrophy; stress management strategies that we don’t use we lose. 

 

Energy is neither created nor destroyed. It simply changes form.  This concept of energy conservation elegantly explains why energies trapped in our bodies lead to illness.  If we are able to think about emotional energies that may get trapped in our systems and make us sick then, we can channel these energies creatively and/or harmlessly discharge them like environmentally friendly steam by talking them out.  “Go ahead and let some steam off responsibly”  is far more desirable than holding it in so that you get a back ache or a stomach ache.  The logic that explains why some people’s vulnerabilities to stress leave them anxious, depressed, substance dependent or headache sufferers is a complex and sometimes impossible mystery to unravel.   We have learned nonetheless, that if the stress is discharged in constructive ways the symptoms will lessen if not disappear.  

 

We know that energy dynamics is the physical principle that governs these processes.  Whether or not an environmental pollutant stresses a body to the point that the inhabitant develops a form of cancer is determined by many factors some of which have to do with their willingness and ability to manage the impact of such a stress on their systems.  If such a person is overweight, depressed, and sedentary he may be more vulnerable to an environmental toxin however, we don’t know for sure why he will or will not develop a life threatening disease.  We do know however, that how he manages or defends against the environmental toxin and other environmental stresses will have an impact on the body’s vulnerabilities to disease producing processes.

 

If you take yourself seriously then, you will take stress in your life very seriously as the levels of stress in your life and how you manage them will go a long way to determine your health and welfare.  Stress management strategies complement each other.  After reading this article you may consider managing stress on your own and/or in combination with professionals like myself to modulate your levels of stress and learn to discharge stress in healthy ways so to keep your mind and body in balance and to have the energy available to achieve meaningful results in your lives.