Advice

Hypnosis Therapy – Controlling And Eliminating Bad Habits

Date: December 18, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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The term hypnosis therapy is being increasingly heard nowadays. Contrary to what many people think hypnosis has nothing to do with black magic or anything supernatural. It is a trancelike state which can be also termed as a state of relaxed concentration. Anyone’s subconscious mind in this state would receive positive suggestions made by the person who is inducing the hypnotic state. This way several positive thoughts can be made to develop in the mind of a person. This in turn can help in treating as well as curing many a psychological problem.
Whenever hypnosis is used for therapeutic use it is known as hypnosis therapy. Hypnosis cannot be induced in any person without the active and total co operation on the part of the person who is to be hypnotized. It is therefore important that anyone who wants to undergo hypnosis therapy should be clear in the mind about wanting to accept the various commands of the therapist.
During the process of hypnosis therapy a trained hypnotist would be able to plant positive suggestions into the subconscious mind of the person being hypnotized. The subconscious mind is considered more powerful than the conscious mind. It also accepts suggestions more easily than the conscious mind. Any suggestion given to the subconscious mind stays for a long duration of time. This is the reason why suggestions are given to the subconscious mind during hypnosis therapy.
One of the most common problems that is treated using hypnosis therapy are addiction to cigarettes and alcohol. Using the method of hypnosis, powerful as well as positive suggestions about quitting these harmful habits can be given to the subconscious mind of the subjects being hypnotized. Millions of people around the world are in fact known to use this method in order to quit smoking nowadays.
This therapy has also been found extremely useful in treating several psychological conditions including anxiety, depression, phobias and fear. These days there is also the case of several people using the therapy in order to control the habit of excessive eating that leads to obesity. Clinical studies done by leading research scientists in this field indicate that this kind of therapy where in the subjects are hypnotized and positive suggestions given can also be used to reduce pain in patients suffering from diseases such as cancer. Historical references point out to such methods of treating several psychological conditions has been in existence for many centuries now. With such a wide range of benefits available from this therapy, it is not surprising that it is finding an increasing number of takers by the day.

How Much Stress, is Too Much Stress?

Date: December 16, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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Your Body must get enough stress to function normally

 

A certain amount of stress is vital to your health, but too much stress can have the negative effect of being destructive to your body and your lifestyle. Constructive amounts of stress give you challenges and brain stimulation, so that your mind can stay active and your body healthy. As a result; this stress is released through body activity and thought processes which is naturally vital to your survival. You also need enough stress to enable your body to continually heal itself by natural reactions to this stress and it is also necessary maintenance for your immune system.

 

Too Much Stress is destructive!

 

Ill health starts happening as a result of too much stress, or as most doctors call it call it; stress overload. Your body is unable to cope with stress overload and starts storing this pent up stress within your body in many different ways. No doubt you have felt the tightening of your neck muscles, diaphragm and back and shoulders. Stress overload can also give you intense headaches and a tightly strung feeling in the pit of your stomach. You can feel nauseous and weak from this. At this point, you could be at the point of a stress nervous breakdown if this stress cannot find a safety release valve. You can help your body find a safety release from excess stress!

 

The different types of Stress.

 

Everyone copes with stress differently. Stress can be the result of fear of the future, from financial worries, peer pressures to perform, family relationship problems, death, anger, shock, and excessive worry about problem/s. In the 21st century stress has become an acute problem that hammers people from all angles on a daily basis. Bad news on the television and newspapers every morning which many people start off the day with, are the initial intake of stress. The second stress buildup comes from commuting and the pressures of being on time at the workplace. During your working day additional stress is piled on by certain factors in your workplace. The constant daily battering you take all ads up and by the end of the day, you can have pent up stress in the form of a migraine or intense headache with tightly wound muscles. Eventually stress overload starts to build up toxins in your body in your muscles and intestines, and this is where you begin suffering a downward spiral in your health.

 

Chemical and pollution stress.

 

There is even more stress that your body is exposed to which you are not even aware of. Chemical stress is added to your emotional stress from pollutants in the air, insecticides and food additives and preservatives as well as harmful chemicals from smoke, especially if you are a city dweller. Considering all this stress that your body needs to deal with in the 21st century;  can give you an idea of how powerful our makeup as human beings is. However your body needs help from you as well. Although up to a certain degree it can handle a lot of  the stress it is facing, extra steps can help you; help yourself.

 

Stress must be released.

 

Muscle stress is best released through some for of activity or exercise. Many people end their day with a training session at the gym. This releases the toxins from muscles and relaxes your body. For emotional stress, a social get together with one or two drinks is also fine as long as it stops there. This is a sensible way of releasing emotional stress through social interaction. No doubt you have heard the saying of people off-loading their problems by sharing them with others. Lastly your body organs can benefit from extra vitamins and antioxidants that you can buy off the shelf. Also be sensible to investigate alternatives to stressful situations that can be changed if you are feeling that it is difficult to cope with your day to day lifestyle. If you are feeling worn out, and as they say, completely drained and stressed out then it is time to seek medical help before it does serious damage to your heart and body organs. Stress is a recognized disease today and should be treated as such.

 

 Stress and healthy Heart Care

Anger Management Therapy – How It Can Help You Manage Anger

Date: December 15, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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In the early 70’s Aaron T. Beck, M.D, a psychiatrist, developed an anger management therapy to treat patients suffering from behavioral problems. Initially this therapy was called Cognitive Therapy but now it is known as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT. For many years Beck helped his patients by using his knowledge of psychiatry for their treatment. However, he found that there was slow progress in the patient’s condition. Wanting to have a more intense approach to the therapy, Beck relied on his experience to find a solution to the issue. He realized that negative feelings are formed during the thought processes of an individual, which led to a change in emotions and thereby behavioral patterns. He analyzed that if a person can be treated at this stage, by helping them change their manner of thinking, it could bring about a marked change in their behavior. This idea formed the basis of CBT.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a relatively fast method of treating patients for anger management. It encourages an individual to make a change in their way of thinking. A person’s response to any situation depends on the way he perceives it. Negative feelings will very often lead to stress and anger in an individual. CBT endeavors to prevent these problems by trying to teach the patient to be positive in their thinking. It uses strategies like assertiveness training and relaxation techniques to provide relief to the patients and has proved to be a highly effective tool for psychological treatment. Many psychologists use CBT to treat their patients and are satisfied with the progress they are making. There is plenty of literature available on the subject and training is provided to those who wish to specialize in the field of anger management therapy.
Persons suffering from anger-related issues very often refuse to accept the fact that they need therapy. It is perceived to be a sign of weakness and they do not want to admit that there is a problem. Contrary to this belief however, it can be said that persons seeking anger management therapy are strong-willed and determined to get help in making a change in their lives. The first step in anger management therapy is when the person admits he needs therapy and willing to take steps to overcome the problem. The next step is to find a good therapist who puts them at ease. The relationship between a patient and his therapist is a very important one. Having a trusting relationship with the therapist is vital to the treatment of psychological problems.
The patient should be able to share his emotions with the therapist. He must be able to communicate his thoughts, aspirations and more importantly, the negative feelings he has towards any circumstances. It is through trust and sharing of thoughts that a person begins to discover himself. The relationship between the individual and his therapist provides a safety zone, where they are free to discuss their inhibitions and innermost fears, thus helping the treatment.
Choosing to undergo Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or Anger Management Therapy is a big step and it requires the encouragement and loving support from family members and friends. With the support of family and friends, those striving to work at their anger related issues will definitely achieve their goal.

Do You Have Social Anxiety Disorder Symptoms?

Date: December 14, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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Beating Social anxiety disorder

Social Anxiety Disorders as the third highest rating psychological issue has been destructing and disrupting the life style of many people. It becomes the common phenomena among so many people and somewhat led to a temporary-to-permanent condition. Even though some suffers are not able to recognise the symptoms of the social anxiety disorder. Often they have mistaken while identifying this disorders in term shyness but the exact fact is something different and need to take attentive measures towards this ailment.

 

Here anyone can get ride of from the anxiety of shyness by constantly meeting and interacting with the people but on other hand, social anxiety disorder is chronic in nature, does not reduce by exposing more to the social situations. This effects on the sufferer’s entire life badly.

 

People can find some of the following social anxiety disorder symptoms which include:

 

 

 

 

Public speaking and interviewed with someone are the common example of social anxiety disorders which can be eliminated if get proper treatment or going thorough some famous Therapies.

 

If suffers are not serious on their social anxiety disorders such as public speaking phobia and other phobias, it may lead to increase and get occupied the whole life of the individual. Many conventional forms of treatments are available in the market to overcome these disorders. It is very important to take treatment or medication when anyone gets suffered by social anxiety disorder from a proper diagnosis specialist or Physiologist.

 

Thought field therapy and tapping therapy are one of the therapies which are being utilised by may suffers and gets confidence over the social anxiety disorders. Some senior Physiologists are on the process of entire treatment for these disorders and provide the treatment at very affordable costs. People get ride of from it within short span of period and bring back their happiness and memorable moments into their life.

 

 

 

Stress And It’S Causes

Date: December 13, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
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STRESS AND ITS CAUSES

Stress can be referred to as an emotional, physical and psychological state of being which is so intense that it hinders our ability to function properly, exhaustion is also a major factor of stress. In this world that we are living in there are thousands of problems that can lead to someone having a stressful life. Some people thing that only persons in high ranks such as lawyers, politicians, general mangers, Judges have stress. This is definitely not so stress isn’t any respecter of persons; it comes to us at any age or time in our life.

 

We can see stress with our eyes, meaning if someone is stress out we can know, because of individuals’ physical appearance and reaction. Some individuals may have the same burden to carry, but different levels of strength. E.g. a housewife may have plenty work to do on a daily basis and she won’t even complain. On the other hand a next housewife may have the same amount of chores to do as the first house wife mentioned, but this one would complain to almost everyone how much things she has to do. I said this to say that everyone carries around their load in different ways; it depends on how much courage and strength you have to deal with the things life offers.

 

Sometimes we cause our own stress by over working ourselves, crossing our limitations, one thing we must learn is not to abuse or limits. When we over do this brings on stress because we are only made up to take a certain amount.

 

STAGES OF STRESS

Stress does not sneak up on its victim, capturing him or her in an unpredictable surprise attack. As humans we can detect when something is not right with us. Stress passes through stages until it reaches its highest level.

 

§        The alarm stage

When we hear the word alarm we know that it is alerting us of something. Therefore when stress reaches alarming stage it is notifying us that something is there, that needs to be on guard. To identify this stage your physical behaviour would change. Your potential drops due to the stressful situation (e.g. too much work, difficulty completing task, etc). Sometimes is only when the stress becomes overwhelming that’s the time the individual, may now realize he/she is in the alarming stage. This is where you have the opportunity to pull yourself together, before things get worse.

 

§        Resistance Stage

When stress goes beyond the initial alarm stage, the person enters into the resistance stage.

 

E.g. If a business owner tries to complete the backlog of work his employee/employees might have left behind for himself. Remember the day just have 24 hours and out of that we need some rest. This business man wants to meet all his business requirements so he pushes himself to the limit. Which in the end causes frustration. He/she becomes drained and their productivity drops and a lot of their energy would be used up.

 

§        The exhaustion Stage

 

This is the final stage of stress. Depression and anxiety is characterized by fatigue.

 

Fatigue: this doesn’t have to do with how some one feels after a long days work. Even if the businessman sleeps for a whole day this would not relieve him. This kind of fatigue is accompanied by nervousness, irritableness, tension, and anger.

 

A person would get very anxious even if the occasion doesn’t call for anxiety.

 

Depression is referred to when a person lack motivation, self esteem; they won’t even find pleasure in fun activities. Sleeplessness and negative thoughts (e.g. suicide etc).can trigger off a person physically and psychologically.

 

 

 

 

CAUSES OF STRESS

There is said to be two types of stress internal and external.

 

First stress factors stems from external circumstances such as our environment, job, family, or studies.

 

Second stress this is the one we can produce for ourselves. The way in which we handle different situations, our personality, our temperament and level of self control can be all sources of stress. Our mental and physical health plays an influential part on the amount of stress we have.

 

Stress doesn’t have to be major it can be simple things that trigger off our stress level, these are some of the things that can stress you out (E.g. getting the kids ready for school, Wars in your country, tragedies such as tsunami, earthquakes, avalanche, losing something that is valuable, along with many other incidents that produces stress.

 

We have to pay very good attention to all the factors that causes stress in our lives. Because if we don’t we can end up with a nervous breakdown, which is a path to MENTAL insanity.

 

OCCUPATIONS WITH A HIGH LEVEL OF STRESS

 

Air Traffic Controller           Businessman

Pilot                                        Physician

Stockbroker                           House wife

Teachers/ Lecturers             Construction worker

Sales person                          Lawyers

Judges                                   Police Officer

Fire Men                                Captain

Prison Officer                        Coast Guards

Telephone operators          Miners

 

The level of stress would vary in each occupation because some is more time consuming and needs a lot of our input for things to run smoothly. There are many more professions that are very strenuous and can bring on stress very strongly, but I only mentioned a few.

 

COPING WITH STRESS ON THE JOB

 

Handling stress is not as easy as it may sound.  When we have to work in environments with hoggish managers and employees, which acts as though they established the company. Sometimes we feel like saying and acting the wrong way to them. This surely won’t solve the problem when we lower ourselves to others to become even.

 

Instead whisper a pray for that person. Try different relaxing techniques at work that can keep your attention away from those that tries everyday to upset, oppress and stress you.

 

Function on what you have to do. Try not to meddle in people personal business as this can cause you to add tension to your existing problems.

 

If perhaps another co-worker has less qualification than you and gets promoted before you do. Don’t get all frustrated and angry about it, Think about it this way in life everything is not fair and what you didn’t get in this life was never meant to be for you. Always keep in your mind that what is for you, there is no one that can take it away.

 

Let’s look at it this way if you had been promoted, you might have gotten proud and look down on others. While you are at a lower position it would keep you humble. Another thing is every day we complain, have you ever stop for a moment and think about those that don’t have jobs. There are so many people dying every day for food, they have no home, clothes etc. But you have a job you have something to eat everyday. Do you know what is to be hungry for weeks, months?

 

Whenever you think that you are in a bad situation there is someone somewhere who is worst off than you. Be grateful for what you have and stop looking at all the big things in life.

 

Wherever we go there will always be different types of people. Don’t think if you get another job it would help, it may in one or two instances but other problems would arise. There are some things that we as humans would never be able to stomach (e.g.

 People who have no self value always looking for conflict, )

 

STRESSFUL EVENTS

 

Most of us if not all face stressful events sometime throughout our life span. Some think that only negative things can cause stress, but it has been proven that also positive things can cause stress. (E.g. if you are promoted on the job for a higher position, this means more would be required of you, because of your rank and also the new salary you would be receiving. Your stress level will surely incline when you have more responsibilities).

 

Negative effects of stress if someone loses their spouse, parent, grandparent, friend etc. by death. This can take a very negative toll on that individual, especially if the individual and the person that died were very close. In some cases some may turn to drinking, smoking just to help them cope with that present stressful phase that him/her may be going through.

 

FRUSTRATIONS THAT WE HAVE TO PUT UP WITH ON A DAILY BASIS.

 

Some of it begins at home, then the everyday traffic we have to face makes us stressed and frustrated before we even reach to work, added to that when you reach to work you have to put up with your work mates who sometimes can be pretty annoying or some old machine, computer in the office that isn’t working efficiently. Especially when you have to complete a task for a certain time, this can be very frustrating, because it slows down your working pace and test your patience.

 

The environment has a very big part to play on how we react to stress. A noisy neighbourhood or workplace can send you crazy if you don’t have patience, temperance, your stress level will be sky rocketed for sure.

 

HAVING OUR OWN SPACE

 

Every human being and animals like to have there own territory to develop and live. Being to cluster can hinder one’s growth. (E.G. some people don’t like being amongst to many people. It can cause them to be nervous or react differently). The way our human natures are made up, we always look for a short cut or some way out of a problem. Rather than facing that problem we run or try to find a solution, which sometimes fails miserably.  I think the best way to deal with any problem is to stand up and face it, even if you may have to shed some tears. Even though we may run from circumstances, ask yourself how far I can run, could you run away from your memory? NO!

 

Let’s say you had a child that died at a very tender age, as a parent you would feel the pain and sorrows that death has to offer. You may go on a trip away from the house for the memory of that child not to hunt you, but believe me when all the fun is over you would return to that same old problem.

 

We run too much from our trials and that’s why some of us never grow up. Most times we are the ones who cause stress on ourselves then we blame it on work, the kids, everyone but ourselves. Let us be men and women, not little cowards.

 

WHY THERE ARE SO MANY MARITAL STRESS

 

Some people think that marriage is a bed of roses; you know there won’t ever be a bad moment. That’s the biggest mistake you would be making if you are to marry. Everyone is different even if you are a twin. You won’t think the same. So when you marry is obviously the husband/wife would have different taught, ideas and ways. You have to decide that you are willing and able to deal with these challenges.

 

I believe many people only hear the nice part of the wedding vows and for the bad part they get deft deliberately. Priest/ pastors say for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer in sickness and in health. Some only hear for BETTER, for RICHER and in HEALTH. That’s why when trouble comes knocking at the door, you run away and ask someone else to get it.

 

Millions of divorces are because of what I said above. People are not willing to deal with there offences. If the husband looses his job. The wife packs up her bag and leave why she not able with the poor life. He gets sick; she is not able with that.

 

In order for things to work out you have to be able to understand each other, forgive gave in sometimes, we as humans hardly like to acknowledge that we are wrong. Always sticking fingers at others. First we have to know how to speak to each other, gave the person the respect he/she needs. In marriage communication is the key to keeping the love alive and surviving marital problems.

 

Gave the person a listening ear while he/she speaks chose the right time to speak, as the saying goes there is a time for everything .Some after marriage they don’t have anything say. Before the wedding they was talking more than their breath would aloud them to breathe.

 

HOW TO PREVENT STRESS

 

There are ways and means that can be used to help prevent stress. I would say that stress is like a cancer cell it lives in your body, it just doesn’t shows up itself. Things have to happen first to trigger it off. It also has no cure like cancer even if you can do certain things to lessen it. At sometime in your life it would pop up. There are times we all feel up and other times we are down.

 

One morning you would get up and just not feel like it, a sign of depression kicks in. You are so out of it, you would be grumpy with the children/friends/co-workers for no particular reason.

 

PREVENTIONS

 

o       Don’t over work yourself

o       Try your best not to get irritable

o       Have less arguments

o       Forgive and try hard to forget

o       Identify your problems in the alarming stage

o       Come to a compromise

o       Be a better husband/wife/child

o       Stay quiet if you have nothing good to say

o       Have a very good spiritual life

o       View others at their age group

 

BRIEFING ON PREVENTIONS MENTIONED ABOVE

 

Over working yourself can cause you to be awfully tired and this is not a good sign. Even if you maybe in a conflict at the moment try calming yourself down before getting all worked up, in a case where your husband/wife/children may upset you think about a better way to deal with them, it will only make the situation tense if you heat up an argument. Always try to maintain a forgiving attitude, remember that no one is perfect. Be the one who are always willing to settle disputes even if it means giving up your rights.

 

Take a moment sit down or take a cool walk outside and talk to yourself, find out what is your problem, why am I reacting like this? Sometimes in life we may compromise a bit just not to hurt the other party feelings, if you are having problems with your husband smoking, coming home late etc. See if you can get him to talk when he is sober. Two of you come to an agreement where you two decide to go to a counsellor for help. Who can help guide you two through your difficult times?

 

HAVE A GOOD SPIRITUAL LIFE

 

Having a spiritual background is really important especially in difficult times. That’s one of the fore most foundations you must lay, have frequent communication with God, read your bible and pray. God alone knows what each and everyone of us go through. There is NO doctor or physician/ psychologist that can fully restore you. They may be able to help, but Jesus is the one who can take away all your burdens.

 

When you are having problems at home and at work just whisper a little prayer. Children straying and don’t want to listen, when you develop a friendly communication with God. He would work to suit in your life; HE alone knows why everything happens to you. If you do as I say you would see a great difference in your life.

 

Many people don’t have time for God is just to jump off the bed in the morning without saying thank you God. If it wasn’t for him you would not have even made it to see another day. Put God first in your life. Some people only put him first when trouble comes, that is not right, know Him in good and bad times. If you want to be selfish and gave all your time to natural things that seems more important to you than God. When you do find the time to pray and he takes long to answer your pray don’t get upset, think about how you treat him.

 

 

 

LET STRESS KNOW WHO’S IN CHARGE

 

We are the ones that are in charge we have a conscience that lives within us to let us know wrong from right. You are the one that controls your body; let stress know that you cannot allow it to control you. Be the one in charge developing that kind of attitude and everything would fall into place. When stress wants to have you all gloomy, take another toll find some things to do that you like that would up lift you.

 

 

 

All the things mentioned above if you apply it to your everyday life there would be changes that you thought you could have never seen in your life.

                                 

 

                                                                   Done By: Abigail Chandler

                                                                   Date: 17/02/09

How Do Hypnotherapy and Tft Work so Fast?

Date: December 13, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
Comments: Leave a reply

 

When it comes to relieving stress, anxiety, fears and phobias, there are treatments that are medical and there are treatments that are alternative. The medical treatments offer the huge possibility of side effects and only work in a small sector of the population for an extended period of time. On the other hand, hypnotherapy when combined with TFT, offers quick results in as little as a few minutes, in some cases, and the results are lasting without the chance of side effects.

 

At the heart of TFT, or thought field therapy, are taps to the skin. These taps are manipulated on certain areas of the body where negative thoughts and feelings rise to the surface. When battling with anxiety, stress, fears and phobias, these negative feelings rise to the surface and are tapped out to balance the Qi. But, in order for TFT to work, the patient must first know the source of the negative feelings.

 

This need for a source is where hypnotherapy comes into play. When TFT is utilized for a patient, they must be thinking about the source of their anxiety, stress, fear or phobia. If that source is unknown, the negative feelings can not rise to the surface and the treatment will be ineffective. Hypnotherapy opens these minds wide through hypnosis to allow the hypnotherapist to find the source of the negative feelings of anxiety, stress, fear or phobia. Once that source is located, the hypnotherapist is able to speak with the patient about the source and thus provide the needed knowledge to bring the negative feelings to the surface.

 

Once the negative feelings are on the surface of the body, the TFT specialist can tap out the feelings and bring the Qi back into focus. This can take mere minutes and the patient will leave the combination session with the relief they have been searching for, for so very long without a medical prescription and a thesis on side effects.

 

The tapping takes place at what are termed meridian points. These meridian points are located on the upper sections of the body and the hands. Only those trained in the specialized TFT will know the exact locations of these meridian points and be able to effectively treat anxiety, stress, fear and phobias in minutes. While there may be many doctors who claim to be trained in TFT or other therapies based upon tapping on certain points of the body, only Roger Callahan (the founder of TFT) offers the true TFT training.

 

Many patients simply do not understand the alternative therapies available for them today and the methods by which these therapies provide such quick and lasting relief. When it comes to anxiety, stress, fear and phobias, the source feelings are very strong. Anyone who has been in a stressful situation understands how strong these feelings can be by the body’s quick reaction to the feelings. This strength of emotion is at the heart of the quick treatment. Unlike other patient complaints, anxiety, stress, fear and phobias are the most easily treated due to the sheer power of the emotions surrounding the patient. Once they have tuned in to these feelings the TFT methods will work quickly to smooth out the negative Qi and balance the flow for the better.

 

When all other therapies have failed, or you simply want to try an alternative therapy before taking the chance on the medical treatments will thousands of side effects, the combination hypnotherapy / TFT session can move those negative feelings out of the body in minutes, not weeks or months and the therapies are all natural and lasting.

5 Stress Management Tips for Effective Communication

Date: December 12, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
Comments: Leave a reply

Not enough time, boss pushing for work to be completed, children are loud, bills to pay, shopping to be done, housework to do, partner asking for your help… and to top it all off you’re suppose to be nice to people by communicating effectively with them? Yikes!If you’re like me, you find it hard to communicate in stressful moments. Stress management techniques don’t always do the trick. In response to stress, you either become aggressive towards other people to release stress or you become submissive to hide the stress.Showing aggression towards another person temporarily feels okay, but then reality kicks in as you feel even more stressed from having hurt the other person. When you are submissive and hide your stress, it internally eats at you as your emotions get suppressed, which then hurts your relationships.When under stress, your communication style will change in response to the situation. You can go from a cool and collected person one moment, yet when a stressful situation impinges your tolerable threshold your calm style likely shifts to the aggressive or submissive behaviors.What behavior you fall back on in stressful situations is the one you have been comfortable with in the past that will have “protected” you. It’s a natural human extinct built within us that we use to block out external factors and listen to internal ones. You probably now are able to realize that stress causes you to block external factors, such as other people’s feelings, as your interpersonal communication skills decline. You begin to only worry for your internal factors.When someone has surpassed their tolerable stress level, telling them to get their “act together” or how ineffective their current communication is, does not work. It won’t work for you either. Communicating better in intense conflict is a matter of managing stress otherwise it is next to impossible to deal with conflict.Stress motivates us to take action, but it too often works against us. I’ve come up with the best five ways and techniques to manage stress that you can use to deal with difficult conflict:1) Stop the stress from rising in the first place. The best technique to deal with stress is to stop it from occurring altogether. You can incorporate other stress management techniques listed below into your stress plan before you get stressed in conflict.2) Breathe. When your stressed levels rise, you breathe shallowly. This causes you to enter the fight or flight response that hurts your ability to effectively communicate. When your stress levels rise, take several deep, slow breathes and you will instantly reduce your stress levels.3) Accept responsibility for how you feel. It is tempting and too easy to release your stress on other people. Do not treat people inappropriately. If you treat people in a way they don’t want to be treated, you build their stress levels, which they will be happy to put back on you.When you accept responsibility, you live in truth. you eliminate blame. You do not become a victim of others. You take control of your feelings. Your new levels of responsibility builds your self-control and ability to manage stress.If someone causes you stress, you need to address the person by explaining to them how you feel, why you feel that way, and what can be done to fix the problem. Do not stress out the person by focusing your reason for being stressed directly on the person, but focus on the problem. Be problem oriented and not person oriented.4) Take time out. Walking away is a guaranteed stress management technique to refresh your mind. If you can afford to go on a Caribbean cruise, go for it! For others who cannot do that, go for a walk or workout at the gym. Being active releases hormones that counter stress. Being away from the stress also takes your mind off the problem and gives you clearer thoughts and feelings. Be sure to address the problem after your time out, however, otherwise you will only have temporarily avoided the real issue.5) Be flexible. Stress is like the sunrise and sunset. It is inevitable. Therefore, the best way to deal with it is to change your behavior and communication. You need to be able to recognize when others are stressed by reading their verbal and nonverbal language then adjust yourself accordingly. Be flexible by going a bit out of your way for them to assist their temporary needs and wants. Don’t run around the world for them, but do be more aware and respondent of them. This can lead you to less stress.Bonus Tip: Ask others about your responses in stressful moments. It is useful to ask others what you do when you enter that threshold level where you begin to block out external factors. Just ask them what you are like and how it makes them feel when you are stressed. You are to ask other people about this because assessing yourself when you experience heavy emotions is an inaccurate source of information.Stress shouldn’t make you miserable. We were given the ability to be stressed to get things done otherwise we would sit on our lazy behinds all day. Learn these ways to manage your stress to effectively communicate, and you will better manage your relationship communication in stressful moments.

Stress- A Part of Daily Life

Date: December 12, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
Comments: Leave a reply

Stress- A Part of Daily Life

Existence is a gradually becoming a very complicated process. In the olden days, life was much simpler. People were bothered with the day to day proceedings. They did not have much complicated life styles. Their unhappiness was much more basic. Maybe it stemmed from lack of money or resources, or the illness of relatives etc. The word ‘stress’ was virtually unknown at that time. These days, every few sentence includes the word stress in it. Most people do not quite realize what exactly it is.

The word ‘stress’ is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as “a state of affair involving demand on physical or mental energy”. A situation or circumstance (not always adverse), which can disturb the normal physical and mental health of an individual. In medical terms ‘stress’ is defined as an alteration of the body’s homeostasis. This demand on mind-body occurs when it tries to cope with incessant changes in life.

A ‘stress’ condition seems ‘relative’ in nature. Extreme stress conditions, psychologists say, are detrimental to human health but in moderation stress is normal and, in many cases, proves useful. Stress, nonetheless, is synonymous with negative conditions.

“Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances.”
—Thomas Jefferson

The events that provoke stress are called stressors, and they cover a whole assortment of situations – everything from absolute physical danger to making a class presentation.

The human body responds to stressors by activating the nervous system and specific hormones. The hypothalamus signals the adrenal glands to produce more of the hormones adrenaline and cortisol and release them into the bloodstream. These hormones speed up heart rate, breathing rate, blood pressure, and metabolism. Blood vessels open wider to let more blood flow to large muscle groups, putting our muscles on alert. Pupils dilate to improve vision. The liver releases some of its stored glucose to increase the body’s energy. And sweat is produced to cool the body. All of these physical changes prepare a person to react quickly and effectively to handle the pressure of the moment.

This natural reaction is known as the stress response. Stress in certain circumstances may be experienced positively. Eustress, for example, can be an adaptive response prompting the activation of internal resources to meet challenges and achieve goals. But the stress response can also cause problems when it overreacts or fails to turn off and reset itself properly.

Good Stress and Bad Stress

The stress response (also called the fight or flight response) is critical during emergency situations, such as when a driver has to slam on the brakes to avoid an accident. It can also be activated in a milder form at a time when the pressure’s on but there’s no actual danger – like stepping up to take the foul shot that could win the game, getting ready to go to a big dance, or sitting down for a final exam. A little of this stress can help keep you on your toes, ready to rise to a challenge. And the nervous system quickly returns to its normal state, standing by to respond again when needed.

But stress doesn’t always happen in response to things that are immediate or that are over quickly. Ongoing or long-term events, like coping with a divorce or moving to a new neighborhood or school, can cause stress, too. Long-term stressful situations can produce a lasting, low-level stress that’s hard on people. The nervous system senses continued pressure and may remain slightly activated and continue to pump out extra stress hormones over an extended period. This can wear out the body’s reserves, leave a person feeling depleted or overwhelmed, weaken the body’s immune system, and cause other problems.

Although just enough stress can be a good thing, stress overload is a different story – too much stress isn’t good for anyone. For example, feeling a little stress about a test that’s coming up can motivate you to study hard. But stressing out too much over the test can make it hard to concentrate on the material you need to learn.

Pressures that are too intense or last too long, or troubles that are shouldered alone, can cause people to feel stress overload. Here are some of the things that can overwhelm the body’s ability to cope if they continue for a long time:

Some stressful situations can be extreme and may require special attention and care. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a very strong stress reaction that can develop in people who have lived through an extremely traumatic event, such as a serious car accident, a natural disaster like an earthquake, or an assault like rape.

Some people have anxiety problems that can cause them to overreact to stress, making even small difficulties seem like crises. If a person frequently feels tense, upset, worried, or stressed, it may be a sign of anxiety. Anxiety problems usually need attention, and many people turn to professional counselors for help in overcoming them.

People who are experiencing stress overload may notice some of the following signs:

Experiences of stress differ from person to person. Some people become angry and act out their stress or take it out on others. Some people internalize it and develop eating disorders or substance abuse problems. And some people who have a chronic illness like blood pressure, blood sugar, arthritis etc may find that the symptoms of their illness flare up under an overload of stress.

Stress-management skills work best when they’re used regularly, not just when the pressure’s on. Knowing how to “de-stress” and doing it when things are relatively calm can help one get through challenging circumstances that may arise. Here are some things that can help keep stress under control.

Some people are very resilient under stressful situations. They’re cool under pressure and able to handle problems as they come up. They are very well balanced and capable.

 

Free Your Mind of Stress

Date: December 11, 2009
Author: Penny Pettman
Categories: Advice
Comments: Leave a reply

I know that many of you will be thinking what will meditation do for me, why is it so important and of course ‘I don’t have time to sit around trying to clear my head, I’m busy’. Well let’s be honest here, do you suffer from stress, now think about this a little more, because the answer is yes and if you’re not sure about that read on and think a little more…and don’t forget to check out my recommendation for easy stress relief.

Why Are We All Stressed?

With modern day living comes the hectic and ever demanding pace of live, it’s no wonder that many of us feel stressed and overworked and how many of us take this home with us, how many others feel the impact of the stress we feel?

Our stress and tiredness of everyday life lead us to the feelings of unhappiness, frustration and a lack of patience when it comes to dealing with even the most simple every day routines. Not to mention the impact that all this has on our health, the tiredness that we feel, the ever nagging inner voice reminding us that we need to do this and that and the other. Or the demands of our boss, our clients, our family and friends all add up to making life one big stress ball.

‘I’m stressed out’, ‘work is one big stress’, ‘I’m under too much stress’, ‘the kids are stressing me out’, these are all phrases that we are all too familiar with and it is also an acceptable part of every day life.

How Do I Define My Stress?

Stress is hard to define as it means different things to different people; however, one thing that is perfectly clear to all of us is that stress is a negative emotion, negative energy as opposed to positive.

Stress can be both physical and mental. Physical stress could be the result of a lack of sleep, or a poor diet and even an effect of an illness. Mental stress can be worrying about money, or how you’re going to survive retirement, or from experiencing a devastatingly emotional event such as the death of a family member, or being fired from work.

Our Natural Stress Response System

But did you know that much of our stress comes from less dramatic everyday routines. Obligations and pressures which are both physical and mental are not always that obvious to us and in response to these daily strains our body automatically invokes a stress response which floods your body with chemicals which increases your blood pressure, your heart rate, the blood flow to your muscles, your metabolism and your respiration. All of these responses are natural reactions so that our bodies are ready to react quickly and effectively under high pressure situations, termed fight or flight. Now whilst a stress response is useful in true emergency situations when you need to be on alert, it can considerably wear your body down when constantly active.

We are all continuously reacting to stressful situations, which is termed stress response, but without making adjustments in our lives to counter the effects. Stress can cause physical, emotional and behavioral disorders which affect our health, vitality and peace of mind; and of course it also affects our personal and professional relationships. Stress is also the key cause to many minor illnesses such as insomnia, headaches and backaches on top of the life threatening diseases such as high blood pressure and even heard disease.

It is also very true that every person handles stress differently, take for example a major life decision like changing careers, or moving house. I know some of you are cringing at the thought, but I also know that some of you would relish the thought. Whatever may be overwhelming to some people might actually be seen as a welcome change to others. An even simpler example is sitting in traffic, some people find this too much to tolerate tooting their horns and screaming out for more coffee, whilst others just take it in their stride maybe with the help of a little music, or a happy thought.

So what’s the answer? Well, aside from the inexhaustible amount of drugs available to reduce stress, which include free side effects I may add, there’s one very simple and natural way to reduce stress that takes 10 to 20 minutes of your day and has no side effects, meditation.

Our Natural Relaxation Response System

Earlier I mentioned that the secret to reducing your stress is by making adjustments in your life to counter the effects of stress, well this is done by evoking a relaxation response within you.

A relaxation response is a state of deep rest that is the opposite of the stress response. The relaxation response brings your body back into balance by deepening your breathing, reducing the stress chemicals in your body, slowing down your heart rate and relaxing your muscles. It also increases your energy, improves your focus, relieves headaches and other aches and pains, heightens your problem solving skills and boosts motivation and productivity and the best news is that with a little practice anyone can gain from these benefits.

Recommendations

As many of you out there are new to meditation and I am certain that there are also many of you who don’t want to get into depth of how to meditate or what form of meditation to use and want a quick head start, I would recommend you begin with an affordable audio meditation. I use several and one that is particularly good for stress relief is Totally Tranquil by Holothink and you can pick up a free ten minute demonstration by clicking on, or copying and pasting this link into your browser: http://holothink.com/hg/?a=V1L0R1YlpM

also increases energy and focus, combats illness, relieves aches and pains, heightens problem-solving abilities, and boosts motivation and productivity. Best of all – with a little practice – anyone can reap these benefits.

deepening your breathing, reducing stress hormones, slowing down your heart rate and blood pressure, and relaxing your muscles.

a state of deep rest that is the polar opposite of the stress response. this is known as Just ten or twenty minutes a day of meditation will bring relief from chronic stress and also increase your tolerance to it.

Remember, each person handles stress differently. Some people actually seek out situations which may appear stressful to others. A major life decision, such as changing careers or buying a house, might be overwhelming for some people, while others may welcome the change. Some find sitting in traffic too much to tolerate, while others take it in stride. The key is determining your personal tolerance levels for stressful situations. Stress can cause physical, emotional and behavioral disorders which can affect your health, vitality, peace-of-mind, as well as personal and professional relationships. Too much stress can cause relatively minor illnesses like insomnia, backaches, or headaches, and can contribute to potentially life-threatening diseases like high blood pressure and heart disease.

Stress can also be mental: when you worry about money, a loved oneÕs illness, retirement, or experience an emotionally devastating event, such as the death of a spouse or being fired from work. However, much of our stress comes from less dramatic everyday responsibilities. Obligations and pressures which are both physical and mental are not always obvious to us. In response to these daily strains your body automatically increases blood pressure, heart rate, respiration, metabolism, and blood flow to you muscles. This response, is intended to help your body react quickly and effectively to a high-pressure situation.

With the hectic pace and demands of modern life, many people feel stressed and over-worked. It often feels like there is just not enough time in the day to get everything done. Our stress and tiredness make us unhappy, impatient and frustrated. It can even affect our health. We are often so busy we feel there is no time to stop and meditate! But meditation actually gives you more time by making your mind calmer and more focused. A simple ten or fifteen minute breathing meditation as explained below can help you to overcome your stress and find some inner peace and balance.

Meditation can also help us to understand our own mind. We can learn how to transform our mind from negative to positive, from disturbed to peaceful, from unhappy to happy. Overcoming negative minds and cultivating constructive thoughts is the purpose of the transforming meditations found in the Buddhist tradition. This is a profound spiritual practice you can enjoy throughout the day, not just while seated in meditation.

Hi there,

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